Urban Jungle
by Samuel Keller
Summary: The zombie heroes of the past are back, and are still kicking ass! Now they've landed in some abandoned city, and whole new horrors await them! Sequel to I Hate Clowns.
1. Chapter 1: Complete Buzzkill

**Hello faithful fans! Last time we left our heroes, they apparently had been struck by lightning! Now, here they are, spick and spam. Enjoy!**

The first thing the Marine noticed was that he was still breathing.

He opened his eyes and saw only darkness. At first he was panic-stricken, thinking he was blind. Then he realized he was lying down.

He rolled over and closed his eyes. He was staring straight at the sun.

He turned his head to the left and opened his eyes. A Japanese Imperial soldier was lying about a foot away from him.

Dempsey reached out and nudged him. "Hey Takman, wake up."

Takeo opened his eyes and said, "American? Good to see you. We must've made it then. Or we're both dead."

Dempsey chuckled and replied, "Naw, I didn't think hell had a sun. I bet we're still alive."

Takeo sat up and looked around. It appeared they seemed to be on some kind of rooftop. The floor was made of yellowish stone and the sides stretched out in all directions. Around him and Dempsey was a large black mark, like a burn mark.

Dempsey sat up and said, "Well, this is the most boring place I've ever woken up to."

Takeo looked behind him and saw two other people lying there unconscious. One of them was wearing a yellow winter coat and holding a large brown bottle. The other was wearing a Nazi SS uniform, muttering German to himself.

Takeo crawled over to the Nazi and whispered, "Doctor, wake up."

Richtofen opened his eyes and bolted up. It seemed he was in the middle of a nightmare. "Samantha! You bitch!" he yelled to no one in particular.

Takeo grabbed him and said, "Doctor, it is I, Takeo. You must've been having a nightmare."

Richtofen looked at him and replied, "Takeo! Ah, vell. Oh damn, my head."

The German lied down and rubbed his temples. "Vhere ze hell are ve?" he asked closing his eyes.

Takeo looked around and answered, "No idea Doctor."

Dempsey went over to Nikolai and said, "Nikolai man. Get your ass up."

Nikolai yawned and sat up. "Ah balls" he muttered looking around. "Every time I wake up and find myself with you motherfuckers, something bad happens. For once, I'd just want to wake up back at my home, with my girlfriend next to me."

Dempsey chuckled and patted him on the shoulder. "If only man" he said standing up.

Dempsey's right hand nudged a metallic object on his thigh and he grabbed it. He raised it to his eye level and discovered it was a Colt M1911.

He scowled and stated, "Every time, this motherfucking pistol is the one we get stuck with. Treyarch really needs to give us a decent weapon for once."

Nikolai pulled out the pistol and remarked, "Ah, stupid ass pistol. Its only good function is as a paperweight."

Takeo and Richtofen got up and Richtofen asked, "Hey, who iz zhat?"

A lone figure was stumbling towards them. He was limping and leaning on his left leg.

Dempsey cupped his hands and shouted, 'Hey man! Who are you?"

The figure didn't respond, but just walked faster. As he got closer, more details became apparent. His skin was completely gray with spots of black. His clothes were an old security uniform, complete with a helmet. His eyes were glowing yellow and he was growling to himself.

"Damn" muttered Dempsey firing into him. The guard only sped up, running in an odd, restricted manner.

They all started firing at him, but he didn't stop. Nikolai rolled his eyes and said, "Enough horse shit." He pulled out his knife and threw it.

It nailed the zombie right in the eye and it fell instantly. Nikolai chuckled and yelled, "Ha ha! Nikolai, cannot die! Hey, that rhymed!"

Nikolai went over to the dead body and pulled out his knife. He looked up and muttered, "Bliad."

He ran back and yelled, "Run, run! For God's sake, run!"

The Russian ran past them and Dempsey said, "Whoa, what's up man?"

Dempsey turned and swore. A long line of approaching zombies were sprinting towards them.

'Run and gun!" he yelled following Nikolai. Richtofen and Takeo were right behind the American, shooting and throwing grenades.

"Hey, an elevator!" announced Nikolai. They looked and sure enough, there was an elevator, completely clear of zombies.

"Ha ha! 'bout time we had some good luck" remarked Dempsey.

Nikolai got inside first. He hit the wall and fired behind them. "Hurry it up!" he ordered reloading.

Dempsey dove in, followed by Richtofen and Takeo. The Marine threw a grenade and said, "For Christ's sake, someone hit the goddamn button!"

Takeo slammed the lobby button and the doors slowly closed. But not before a zombie had grabbed Richtofen with a large claw.

"Nien!" yelled Richtofen grabbed the arm. He pulled and said, "One limb at a time!" Then with an impressive showing of strength, he ripped the arm right off the thing's body.

The elevator doors completely closed and Richtofen tossed the arm aside. "Holy shit" muttered Dempsey.

The elevator reached the lobby and the group stepped out. The lobby had a business kind of setting to it, with metal sides and steel benches. Blood stains covered the walls and words were written in the red fluid.

Dempsey walked over to a large chalk outline and said, "Buy." A large over-and-under shotgun fell into his hands. The Marine laughed maniacally, "This'll spread the love!"

Richtofen went over to a large chalk outline and bought it. A large rifle popped out. Richtofen smiled and brought back the hammer. "They vill bleed!" he yelled in a high pitched voice.

Then the power shut off.

"Fuck" muttered Dempsey.

**See how I've changed my writing style a little? Hope it makes a difference. Goodbye!**


	2. Chapter 2: New Alliances

**Back in black! Our heroes have only been in this strange new place for five minutes and already wish they weren't here. Then I'm doing a good job! Read on!**

Dempsey sat down on a grey bench holding his Olympia shotgun. "Great, we lost the power. Ain't that swell."

Nikolai shrugged and said, "Big deal. All we had in here was that shitty Quick Revive anyway."

Takeo scoffed and argued, "I disagree Cossack. Quick Revive is actually very refreshing."

Dempsey smiled and replied, "Yeah, if you like drinking cat piss."

Richtofen came over and stated, "Vhatever. Ve lost ze power, ve'll find it again. Now, vhile you dumb shits vere sitting here complaining, I have found four barricades. I recommend you get to your stations."

Dempsey stood up and said, "Lead the way Doc."

After everyone had gotten to their barricades, the zombies started coming.

Nikolai

The Russian was stuck in some godforsaken conference room with a barricade over some door. The entire room was covered in blood and smelled like Nikolai's goulash. (Not a pretty sight)

"Watch out zombies, Nikolai is coming for you!" he yelled. He knifed a zombie and said, "I stab thee! Hey, I've heard that one before!"

Takeo

The samurai was guarding in front of a door that was probably once an elevator at one time. The zombies simply jumped down and Takeo sliced them with his katana.

"Feel glad, knowing you have helped the honorable!" he yelled.

He fried off half a clip and stabbed another. "You shall not touch the living!"

Dempsey

The Marine was positioned near a door that lead to a bloodstained bathroom. "Poor zombies. They just needed to take a leak"

He fired his Olympia and blew apart a zombie. "Now you match the walls!" he yelled.

He reloaded and fired again. "I love the smell of burning gunpowder!"

Richtofen

The doctor was standing in front of a barricade that lead to another hallway. "Ze Doctor is in!"

He popped a headshot and said, "Your brains taste so delicious!"

He got another headshot and said, "One, two, three heads on my vall!"

Nikolai

"Oh man" muttered Nikolai backing up. The zombies had finally gotten enough together to tear down his barricade.

"You die quickly, and in large numbers!" he said throwing a grenade.

It blew up and he laughed. "Ha ha! Now you go BOOM! Like first wife!"

Takeo 

Takeo backed up and raised the M1911. The zombies were already out of the barricade and closing in.

"Now you die!" he yelled firing the pistol. He sliced a zombie and stabbed a second.

"A whirlwind of steel!" he shouted.

Dempsey

Dempsey slammed in another shell and fired. He was already running low on ammo.

"Hey player! Find me some damn ammo!" he roared to no one in particular.

He killed two zombies in one shot and said, "You guys are just falling apart!"

Richtofen

The Doctor emptied an entire clip of his M14 into the mass of zombies at the window.

"I cannot have fun with no ammo in my gun! Ha ha! I'm a poet, and I didn't know it!"

He threw a grenade and made several crawlers. One in particular tried to bite his shins.

He kicked it and said, "Get off my shoes schwein! Hee hee, shoe schwein."

Nikolai

"Oh great" he muttered. He had just gotten swarmed by five zombies. This was getting old.

"Do not leave me to the maggots!" he yelled firing his pistol into the five.

Suddenly, shotgun shots came from the other end of the room.

Dempsey roared and killed the five zombies. "I gotcha man!" he said helping Nikolai up.

"What, I was just taking nap" defended the Russian.

Dempsey rolled his eyes and muttered, "Yeah right."

Takeo

Takeo killed the last zombie at his window and noticed zombies flooding from Dempsey's window. "Stupid American" he muttered throwing a grenade.

It sent bits of the undead everywhere and Takeo shouted, "Stop spreading your dishonor all over the walls!"

Richtofen came over and said, "Oh good. It seems ve are finished here. Now, I have found two exits. One iz ze main door, and ze other iz a door that leads to another conference room. I vill let you choose this one Takeo."

Takeo thought for a moment and replied, "The main door. Its honor is speaking to me."

Richtofen shrugged and said, "Ok."

A loud banging noise caught both of their attentions. Takeo and Richtofen raised their weapons and the noise continued.

"Vhat ze…" asked Richtofen

An elevator exploded and sent shrapnel everywhere. A large, bulky figure was standing there. He was wearing a SWAT uniform and was easily seven feet tall. Bones grew out of its body and were sharpened to jagged points. Its face was disfigured and its arms hung at its sides.

"Oh scheise!" yelled Richtofen. He fired all his M14 clip into the thing and said, "All little help vould be nice!"

Dempsey and Nikolai burst out of the office room and looked at the monster. "Holy piss!" shoutedDempsey.

The American fired two shots into the thing's face and said, "Die for fuck's sake!"

The thing roared and swung a large spiked arm. Dempsey flew backwards and hit a wall. "Dammit" he muttered.

Nikolai threw a grenade and said, "Who are you, fucking Rasputin? Stay dead this time!"

The thing stumbled, but kept coming forward. Takeo pulled out his katana and roared, "Time to die!"

The samurai sprinted towards the thing and jumped onto a long table. He ran across the table and leapt in the air.

Takeo landed on the thing's shoulder blades and sent his katana straight into the soft flesh of its neck.

The thing roared in pain and Takeo jumped off. The zombie fell and Takeo pulled out his katana.

"What the fuck was that?" yelled Dempsey.

Richtofen shrugged and said, "I do not know American. Dis thing iz probably an American project."

Dempsey reloaded his Olympia and stated, "Come on Takman. Let's go."

Takeo shrugged and answered, "Ok American. I recommend going through the main door."

The two walked off and Richtofen said, "Vell, zhat vaze unexpected."

**Very unexpected. But I thought a new partnership would be a little let's cross our fingers and hope it works!**


	3. Chapter 3: Dream Car

**Well, this is one of my favorite chapters. You'll probably figure it out as you go. **

Dempsey and Takeo

The lobby door was boarded up and completely blocked out the outside light.

Takeo grabbed a board and tore it off. "Please help me American" he said tossing the wood aside.

As they worked, Takeo asked, "So American, did you and Nikolai get in a fight? Why did you not go with him?"

Dempsey smiled and replied, "Because after I saw how you dealt with that thing, I think having another ass-kicker beside me would be a good idea."

Takeo shrugged and tore off another board. Made sense to him.

Richtofen and Nikolai

The two odd soldiers stood in front of the locked door, trying to figure out a way to open it.

Nikolai took several steps back and said, "Richtofen, you might want to move."

Richtofen obliged and Nikolai charged. He smashed through the door and collapsed on the floor. "Oof" he muttered getting up.

Richtofen walked in and stated, "Very impressive strength Cossack. Better zhen Takeo's I'd say."

Nikolai smiled and answered, "I'm better then Takeo in every way."

This new alliance actually suited Richtofen. He was sensing some hostility from Takeo, and he was sure that samurai was beginning to break the programming. Nikolai however, just didn't like his personality. And Richtofen was fine with that.

The room they had entered was a conference room, like the one Nikolai was in. Dozens of bullet casings lay on the table and an arm was stuck on a chair.

Richtofen then noticed the massive hole in the wall. It was at least two meters wide and seemed to be made from an explosion.

The Doctor walked around the table and stopped. On a chair directly to his left was a teddy bear, sitting in a seat. It was wearing a blood stained business suit and holding a little briefcase.

Richtofen scowled and grabbed the bear. He grasped its head and ripped it in half.

A loud ringing noise went out and Nikolai said, "Oh great. Another song."

Dempsey and Takeo

The dynamic duo finally cleared the barricade and stepped outside. The sun was still as bright, and Dempsey noticed it was pretty cool.

"This is perfect zombie killing weather!" exclaimed the American.

The two had just entered the parking lot, and noticed a lot of the cars were trashed. Several were crashed into another and formed walls of sorts.

"Well, this is interesting" said Takeo.

Takeo walked over to a sign with a chalk outline and said, "Buy."

A small SMG fell into his hands. Takeo raised the PM63 and stated, "Good things, come with SMG's."

Dempsey went over to a vending machine that seemed very out of place and yelled, "Rat a tat tat! URA!"

He patted the Double Tap Root Beer machine and said, "God, I love this stuff. Too bad it's more like a fricking milkshake then root beer."

Takeo scowled and said, "Uh, American. I believe we have company."

Dempsey looked up and saw the large crowd of zombies coming closer to them. "I'll send you straight back to your graves!" he yelled raising the Olympia.

Richtofen and Nikolai 

The German and Russian dropped down through the hole and looked around. They seemed to be in some kind of a side alley.

"Ah, dark alleys. I know them well" said Nikolai.

Richtofen looked down the alley and declared, "Hey Nikolai! I believe I have found the MPL!"

Nikolai bought the SMG and said, "Good, I needed a bullet hose."

A loud growl interrupted his thought. He turned and fired his MPL. A large line of zombies were coming quickly towards him.

"I will make Stalin proud!" he yelled.

Dempsey and Takeo

Dempsey reloaded his shotgun and said, "Takman! To your left!"

Takeo turned and slashed the zombie. "Death overtakes you!" he shouted.

Dempsey fired his Olympia and said, "Killing zombies since 1945! URA!"

Takeo unloaded his PM63 into the crowd and said, "The Emperor would be proud of my aim!"

Richtofen and Nikolai

Richtofen came over to Nikolai and said, "Your aim iz superb Cossack, despite your lack of focus!"

Nikolai reloaded and muttered, "Someone is not sharing their ammo!"

Richtofen threw a grenade and announced, "Duck and cover!" They ran several meters away and watched the crowd explode.

Richtofen smiled and yelled, "Ja! Spleens for everybody!"

Dempsey and Takeo

Dempsey killed the last zombie and said, "Come on! Let's haul ass!"

The two warriors walked through the maze of cars, noticing several exceptional models.

"Oh fuck yeah!" yelled Dempsey. He ran over to the car and said, "Oh my God. It's a '64 Corvette with crimson paint job and golden trim. Shit, this is nice!"

Takeo shrugged and said, "Whatever. It's no good without gas."

Dempsey scowled and replied, "Takman, for once you are completely wrong. This shit's all good even without gas."

"Besides" said the American turning the ignition. It sparked and came to life. Dempsey smiled and said, "We have gas."

**Sweet****as****hell!****Gotta****love****the****Corvette!****Later!**


	4. Chapter 4: Billions and billions killed

**No comments today, so back to the reading!**

Richtofen and Nikolai

The Doctor walked to the end of the alley and stated, "Oh great."

The alley led to nowhere, but there was a lightly barricaded mound over a hole in the wall.

"Help me vith dis Nikolai" said Richtofen smashing through a board. Nikolai ripped off a board and muttered, "This is so ironic I think I need more vodka."

They tore through the final board and walked inside. It was some sort of apartment building. Most of the doors were either shut or had large furniture blocking the entrance.

"Rather homey" joked Nikolai looking around. "Doors that don't open, not a single damn working light. Just like home!"

Richtofen smiled and walked down to the end of the hallway. On the wall was a large chalk outline. Richtofen went over to it and said, "Buy." A medium sized SMG fell into his hands. A MP5K.

Richtofen smiled and stated, "Not as precise as my formulas but it vill do."

Dempsey and Takeo

"Um, American. You do realize we are in a sports sedan, not a truck right?"

Takeo was seated shotgun to Dempsey, who had finally gotten down the controls of the car. At the end of the parking lot was a massive gate, and their car was headed right for it.

Dempsey smiled and answered, "Of course. That's why we jump before we hit. Like I said, I always have a plan."

The Corvette drew closer to the gate and Dempsey yelled, "Jump!"

Takeo and Dempsey tucked and rolled out of the sports car. The Corvette hit the gate at full speed and went right through. Sadly, it didn't go very far until it hit the restaurant on the other side.

"Oh man" muttered Dempsey coming to it. The car had crashed onto a concrete pillar and was completely totaled.

"I'm so sorry baby" Dempsey whispered to the wreck. "I'm so sorry."

Takeo clapped him on the shoulder and said, "Do not despair American. Her sacrifice was not in vain."

Dempsey sniffed and stood up. "Right" he replied pulling out his Olympia. "Now don't tell me this s a fucking McDonald's!"

Richtofen and Nikolai

"Oh crap" said Nikolai backing up.

One of the doors had burst open between Nikolai and Richtofen and one of those juggernaut thins was there.

"I need help Richtofen!" he yelled in fear.

Richtofen turned and fired at the large crowd of zombies approaching him. "I am a little busy Cossack!"

Nikolai reloaded the MPL and threw a grenade at the juggernaut.

"Eat shrapnel hellpig!" he yelled

The grenade exploded and blew off the thing's left arm. It roared in pain and swung at Nikolai.

Nikolai ducked and fired all 24 shots into the thing's neck. They impacted with small thumps and sent blood all over Nikolai.

"Ugh great. Now I have to dry-clean!"

Dempsey and Takeo 

Dempsey walked around the restaurant and stated, "I love this place. Hey maybe we can get some burgers and fries. I'm kinda hungry."

Takeo shook his head and answered, "No thank you American. I prefer sushi over fried things. You may have all that you like."

Dempsey walked inside the kitchen and saw the glowing warming rack. "Yes" he said grabbed a box.

He opened the box and grabbed the sandwich. He took a bite and smiled, "Still just as good' he said chewing the sandwich. "Litter smaller, but still good."

Dempsey slid the box into his pocket and stated, "I'll finish it later."

Takeo looked to his left and saw something rather out of place. "Well this is odd" said the samurai walking to the vending machine.

He tapped the Deadshot Daiquiri machine and said, "Daiquiri? Ha! More like Kool-Aid."

Dempsey walked over to the machine next to it and said, "Ah Coke." He pulled out his canteen and filled it with the black fizzy liquid. He took a sip and sighed. Then he scowled.

"Ah piss shit, they changed the recipe!"

Richtofen and Nikolai

Nikolai rammed his knife into the juggernaut's throat and said, "Raagh!"

He backed up and shot it in the face. "If you cannot beat me, then maybe you are not drinking enough!"

The juggernaut swung his arm and sent Nikolai into a wall. Nikolai groaned and stood up. "Ok then. Round Two bitch!"

Richtofen raced over to the juggernaut and unloaded the MP5K into the zombie. "Come to Uncle Richtofen!" he yelled filling the zombie with bullets.

Nikolai roared and punched the knife. The zombie gurgled and collapsed. Nikolai took out his signature bottle and shouted, "Da! Victory over the hell spawn!"

**Don****'****t****celebrate****too****quickly****Nikolai.****Thing****'****s****never****go****the****right****way.****Back****next****time!**


	5. Chapter 5: Magarita

**Hello! Now, this is where I introduce a NEW PERK! Yeah, I made another!**

Dempsey and Takeo

The American walked over to the chalk outline and said, "Buy." A large submachine gun fell into his hands. An AK74u.

Dempsey smiled and announced, "Hey Nikolai. If you can hear me, that's the sound of me thanking your country for making this bad ass little gun."

Takeo scoffed and stated, "Bah, that drunk wouldn't know which end to shoot from."

Dempsey laughed and agreed, "You're probably right."

The samurai walked to the back room and saw a large ladder. "Hey American!" he yelled. "I think we have access to above!"

Dempsey came in and looked up. "Hey, this is cool."

Takeo climbed the ladder and cleared the roof. On the roof was several dead bodies and some weird turret.

Dempsey came up and asked, "What the fuck is this?"

It appeared to be a Dragunov hooked up to a turret. Dempsey studied it and concluded, "Well it's unique, I'll give it that. Probably some long-range-gadget-do-hickey-shit or something."

Takeo looked over the rim of the roof and said, "American, we have company."

Dempsey raised his AK74u. "I'll tear out their intestines!"

Richtofen and Nikolai

The two odd warriors walked up the stairs and looked around. Only one door was open.

Richtofen went inside and saw the large vending machine. He smiled and shouted, "Ja! I struck prune juice!"

Nikolai walked in and said, "Bah. The only glop I here is the sound of my vomit hitting the floor."

Richtofen chuckled and stated, "Not bad Cossack."

Nikolai looked to his left and muttered, "Holy crap. This guy ain't getting his deposit back."

There was a large hole in one of the walls. Nikolai looked out and saw that the building's sign had fell in just the right way to make sort of a ramp.

Nikolai climbed out the window and said, "Richtofen, I have found a way forward."

Richtofen observed this and replied, "Ah, good idea Nikolai." Richtofen followed and they landed in the middle of a street. Debris was everywhere and seemed to make walls.

"Damn" was all Richtofen managed to get out.

Nikolai shrugged and said, "Whatever. Compared to Stalingrad, this is house cleaning."

Richtofen smiled and stated, "Hey Cossack. I think ve just found ze bar."

Dempsey and Takeo

"Grind you up!"

Dempsey unloaded the AK74u and slammed in another mag. "Come on you ugly ass cock blocks!" he yelled.

Takeo sliced his katana and shouted, "Feel my blade!"

Dempsey threw a grenade down the ladder and blood flew in every direction. "It's the Fountain of Death!"

Richtofen and Nikolai

"I fucking love this place!"

The two Europeans were trying various drinks inside the bar. It was a strip club, but to the despair of both, no strippers.

"Now this isn't bad" said Nikolai holding a Jack Daniels whiskey. Richtofen shrugged and sipped his self-made cherry cocktail. For some reason he was really craving one right now.

"But this" said Nikolai hefting a bottle of Smirnoff "is good shit! Who knew those damn Brits could make drinks?"

Richtofen shrugged and said, "Not me. All I thought the Brits made was tea and crump bits."

Nikolai laughed and clapped Richtofen on the back. "Not bad German. In a few years, you could be almost as funny as me."

Richtofen normally would've shot him for such arrogance, but the Doctor knew to keep his anger in check. The Russian could kick his ass in a fist fight.

"Hey, check that out!" stated Nikolai tossing aside the bottle. He walked over to the vending machine and said, "Cool, new perk time!"

The machine was a futuristic drink dispenser. It was made of polished chrome and had a touch screen.

"Hm, Magarita" said Nikolai reading the label. He scowled and muttered, "Ugh. I fucking hate margaritas."

Richtofen came over and stated, "I agree. At least a man can drink something like a sake-based cocktail or a vodka-based. But margarita? Hell no!"

Nikolai shrugged and looked over to the chalk outline on his left. He walked over to it and bought the weapon. A large shotgun fell into his hands.

Nikolai laughed and pumped the action. "Vodka and shotguns. Two of my favorite things!"

Dempsey and Takeo

Takeo split a zombie in half with his sword and put it back in the sheath.

Dempsey reloaded the AK74u and said, "Come on! Let's move!"

Dempsey leaped down and cleared the kitchen. Takeo followed, drawing his katana.

The two walked through the restaurant and reached the back door. Dempsey placed a shoulder against it and pushed it open.

They were on one side of a street. Mounds of debris formed walls around them and a large crater was to Dempsey's left.

"Holy shit" muttered the American.

Takeo entered the street and said, "Come on American. We must keep going."

**Cool idea right? It's pretty obvious what it does, but I won't tell till they buy it. Goodbye!**


	6. Chapter 6: Trail of breadcrumbs

**Happy new year! As celebration of 2012, here's a new chapter!**

Richtofen and Nikolai

Nikolai jumped on a table and fired the Stakeout. "Taste Russian hospitality!" he yelled.

No sooner had he purchased the shotgun when zombies began pouring into the bar.

Richtofen unloaded the MP5K and said, "For you, ze Doctor brings…DEATH!"

Nikolai reloaded his shotgun and stated, "You are brave Richtofen, like third wife! But you are also crazy, like second wife! Odd combo."

Dempsey and Takeo

The two soldiers walked through the rubble, trying to get to the other side.

"Jesus Christ" muttered Dempsey. "Everything looks the goddamn same."

Takeo nodded and replied, "Yes, but we can still travel with help from the sun."

Takeo looked up and studied the sky for a few moments. Then he said, "This way."

The samurai went off down a corridor and Dempsey closely followed.

Richtofen and Nikolai

Richtofen pulled out his M14 and shouted, "Your voices shall cease!"

He popped a headshot and noticed an odd green power up. Then he smiled.

"Santa's coming to town, ja!" he yelled grabbing the price tag.

Dempsey and Takeo

Dempsey immediately looked up to the sky for the blue light. "Come on Takman!" he said running through the maze.

After ten seconds, he had found it. He flipped the latch and watched it cycle through the weapons. "Come on, papa needs a new pair of shoes!"

It settled on a Python and Dempsey swore loudly. "Stupid ass box!" he yelled grabbing the revolver.

Takeo activated the box and watched it tick by. Then it settled on a China Lake.

Takeo rolled his eyes and took the grenade launcher. "Ha ha, I get it. I'm Japanese, and I got a China Lake. Not funny."

Richtofen and Nikolai

Nikolai activated the box and saw it settle on a Dragunov. He smiled and grabbed the sniper rifle. "Pure Russian power!" he exclaimed.

Richtofen started the box cycle and watched it stop on a Spectre.

"Neat-o!" he stated holding the small SMG. He fired his recently obtained gun into the crowd of zombies and said, "Ze blood vill be painted on ze valls!"

Dempsey and Takeo

The box disappeared and Dempsey hit the stack of boxes that replaced it.

"One of these days box, I'll find an axe. And oh boy, you are going to be screwed."

Takeo sighed and hung up his China Lake. "Let us continue" he said walking away.

Richtofen and Nikolai

Richtofen killed the last zombie and said, "I am sorry Nikolai, but ve have to exit ze bar."

Nikolai waved his hand and responded, "Whatever. I have plenty of vodka that is ten times better then anything in this bar."

The Europeans walked out the back door and saw the long alleyway. One half of the alley was the large bar, the other was a fence. Behind the fence was a construction site.

"Well, this is getting better and better" joked Nikolai.

Dempsey and Takeo

The two warriors finally made it out of the street and reached a large recreation center.

"Hey, this is cool" said Dempsey opening the door. They were inside the lobby, and it was pitch dark.

Dempsey lit a flare and a red glow emitted around the room.

The two warriors walked into the next room. This room looked like an office place. A large vending machine was positioned next to the wall and Dempsey instantly recognized it.

"Ah, ass kicking juice!" yelled Dempsey walking over to the White Lightning machine. He patted it and said, "Don't worry baby. We'll get that power on ASAP."

Takeo noticed a large hole blown out of the wall and said, "American, bring the flare over here."

Dempsey came over and asked, "Something wrong?"

Takeo pointed inside the hole and stated, "That is the pool, correct?"

Dempsey looked and saw the immense concrete structure. He smiled and answered, "Yep, that's it. Wanna take a swim?"

Takeo flipped a light switch and said, "I don't think you want to swim in that American."

Dempsey's eyes adjusted and he swore loudly. The pool was two feet full of blood. Bodies were floating on the surface and the entire damn room smelled.

"Ah piss shit" muttered Dempsey grabbing his nose.

Takeo didn't even seem slightly bothered with the smell. He walked over to the side of the pool and grabbed a pail on the ground. He dipped it in the pool and began walking back.

"Where you going?" asked Dempsey disgusted.

Takeo looked at him and replied, "To mark the route through the maze."

**Little gross right? Had to be done. Later!**


	7. Chapter 7: Blind Luck

**Hello again! Now this one is actually one of the longest, so enjoy it! Read on!**

Richtofen and Nikolai

"Vell, dis is interesting."

The construction site they had entered was an immense courtyard of steel and dirt. Several abandoned half-finished structures were scattered around the yard and metal pipes lay on the ground.

"This place is like my summer home! But with no whores" stated Nikolai holding his Stakeout.

Richtofen chuckled and examined a wooden sign. On the sign was an oddly shaped chalk outline. Richtofen bought it and a large crowbar fell into his hands.

Richtofen raised an eyebrow and muttered, "German ingenuity, in the palms of my hands!"

Nikolai bought the crowbar and said, "Cool. Now I can open any crate of spirits I'll ever find!"

Dempsey and Takeo

Dempsey walked along the length of the pool and came to a side door. He tried to push it open, but no go.

Dempsey swore and hit the door in frustration.

Takeo came in and tossed aside the empty bucket. He went over to Dempsey and said, "Have you found a way out?"

Dempsey shrugged and replied, "Maybe. This door is bolted shut."

Takeo pulled out the China Lake and declared, "I got an idea."

Richtofen and Nikolai

Richtofen looked to his left and saw a large generator. "No way" he said walking quickly towards it.

He reached the generator and noticed it was positioned near a large ravine. On the other side was a similar generator and the rest of the construction site.

"Vhat iz going on here?" he thought to himself.

Richtofen flipped the switch, but no sound of it turning on. He did it again, but still nothing.

"Of course" he muttered. The other generator would have to be turned on before the power could come on.

Dempsey and Takeo

Takeo positioned himself at the other end of the pool and aimed the grenade launcher. He had to get a direct shot to break the door.

Dempsey fired the Python and shouted, "Whatever you're gonna do Takman, do it now!"

A crowd of zombies was running towards them and Dempsey was having trouble holding them off.

Takeo fired the grenade launcher and hit the steel door dead on. The grenade blew apart the door and sent sunlight pouring into the building.

"Hell yeah! That was sweet!" yelled Dempsey.

Takeo turned and fired his second shot into the crowd of undead. It exploded and sent pieces flying.

"URA! It's raining freak-bits!" said Dempsey.

Richtofen and Nikolai

Richtofen swung the crowbar and connected with a zombie's jaw. It sent its head snapping leftward and broke the spine.

"Schweinhund!" he yelled.

Nikolai fired the Stakeout and said, "Feel the might of the Russian army!"

Richtofen sent the end of the crowbar into a zombie's head and stated, "SILENCE MINION! I KILL YOU!"

Dempsey and Takeo

"Shit, it's like a friggin' flashbang out here!"

The two stepped out of the pool and were met with blinding sunlight. It stalled them, but they kept running.

"Ugh, where are we going?" asked Dempsey blocking the light with a forearm.

"I do not know. My eyes are still unadjusted" replied Takeo.

They stumbled into wherever they were and Dempsey caught glimpses of the environment. Steel bars, concrete blocks, wood scraps.

Dempsey turned and glanced the incoming horde behind them. He raised the Python and fired blind. The large caliber rounds sank into the crowd, but he felt like he had barely scratched them.

Takeo whirled around and fired the China Lake. It blew apart the crowd, but more were quickly joining.

Dempsey's vision finally cleared and he got a complete view of his surroundings. He and Takeo were inside a construction site. A large generator was behind him, and behind that was a huge ravine. And behind that was, wait, Nikolai?

"Hey Nikolai!" he yelled over the ravine. The Russian turned and exclaimed, "Ah, Dempsey! Good to see you!"

Then Nikolai saw the horde behind Dempsey and swore.

Nikolai went prone and pulled out the Dragunov. He aimed down the scope and fired. The large caliber bullet went through the zombie's head and sank into another.

"Just like 4th wife!" he yelled firing again.

Richtofen fired the Spectre and stated, "Stupid American. Always having all the fun."

Takeo fired his second China Lake shot and blew apart the horde. They wouldn't be able to hold off for long.

"Turn on ze damn generator!" shouted Richtofen.

Dempsey ran over to it and flipped the switch. A loud groan went out and a crane about ten feet from them began moving.

It went over to the ravine and dropped its load: a large ten foot long metal panel.

The panel fell and hit the ground. Now there was a bridge between the two sides.

"Fuck yeah!" yelled Dempsey. He ran over to the panel and fired more of his Python. Takeo reloaded the China Lake and ran over to the other side.

"Zhey vant your apple pies American!" shouted Richtofen.

"Richtofen! Shut up you dumbass Kraut!" replied Dempsey.

They ran back into the bar and noticed the lights were on. Heavy metal was playing loudly and all the team smiled.

"This. Is. AWESOME!" yelled Dempsey turning and shooting into the crowd.

"Ze Doctor prescribes PAIN!" declared Richtofen.

They ran out of the bar and sprinted up the sign. "This sucks" muttered Nikolai struggling to keep up.

Dempsey helped him up and sad, "Just hold on. We only got about thirty more zombies!"

They ran down the stairs and set up a firing line in front.

"Come on. Samurai are not ones for waiting" said Takeo raising the PM63.

The zombies poured down the staircase and they all fired. The gunshots echoed though the room and the zombies dissolved. But more quickly filled their ranks.

"Move!" ordered Dempsey.

They sprinted out of the apartment building and ran into the alley. They threw several grenades down the alley and jumped into the spawn room.

"The elevator!" shouted Nikolai.

Dempsey turned and saw the elevator doors were now open.

"Haul ass people!" announced Dempsey.

They ran into the elevator and pushed the only available button: Up.

The elevator's doors closed and Richtofen asked, "Any idea vhere dis is going?"

Dempsey shrugged and responded, "No clue Doc. Probably the roof."

It stopped and opened. But instead of the roof, it was a large corridor. And at the end of said corridor was the Pack-a-Punch machine.

"Alright!" yelled Dempsey. He ran over to the machine and put in the Python. "Why not?" he thought.

Dempsey pulled out the Cobra and stated, "At least it can't suck more!"

Takeo put in the PM63 and announced, "This accursed machine blasphemes against me!"

Takeo pulled out the two SMGs and said, "Speaking of which, I actually have a rose on my own."

"Wait, you have a girlfriend?" asked Nikolai more then curious.

Takeo nodded and pulled out his wallet. He grabbed a photo and showed it to Nikolai.

Nikolai raised an eyebrow and stated, "Damn. Who knew our samurai could catch big?"

Dempsey examined the photo and whistled. "Jesus Takman. She is a beauty."

Nikolai put in the Stakeout and muttered, "Big deal. I've had twelve girlfriends, two of which are still alive."

Nikolai grabbed the Raid and laughed. "I give a toast. To German ingenuity."

Richtofen inserted the Spectre and said, "Thank you Cossack. I vas getting parched."

Richtofen took out the Phantom and shouted, "So light and chaotic! Just like ze Monkey Bomb!"

Then they heard a loud thud.

Dempsey raised the Cobra and whispered, "Did you hear that?"

Richtofen rolled his eyes and responded, "No American. We are all as deaf as bats. Of course we heard it!"

The wall in front of them exploded and sent the four of them flying backwards. And out of the smoke stepped a Juggernaut.

"Fucking run!" yelled Dempsey.

They sprinted down the hallway and turned their heads. The juggernaut was actually running after them.

"Ugh, cocksucker" muttered Dempsey.

They reached the elevator and Takeo slammed the down button. The doors closed, but a large spike of bone sank through the metal and stopped an inch from Richtofen's nose.

They began moving down and the bone snapped off. Richtofen sighed and muttered, "Too close."

**Exciting right? I like this one, just because it's one of the longer ones. See ya!**


	8. Chapter 8: 400 Meter Dash

**Sorry it's been a while since I've updated, so enjoy this one!**

Takeo walked to the front of the elevator and stated, "I will go first. Richtofen and Nikolai follow, and Dempsey bring up the rear."

They all agreed, and Dempsey clapped Takeo on the shoulder. "Good luck" said the American.

Takeo nodded and raised the Tokyo and Rose.

The elevator reached the bottom and Takeo exploded out of the door. He ran, firing the two SMGs.

He popped out the empty mags and threw the guns into the air. He slid to a kneel and raised two fresh mags.

He threw the mags into the air and they perfectly slid into the guns. He caught the guns and fired at the surviving zombies. He stopped and reloaded.

Dempsey whistled and said, "Well goddamn Takman. I didn't know you could do Matrix shit like that."

Takeo simply smiled.

Richtofen got out of the elevator and said, "Come on idoten. Just follow me and try not to die."

And with that, Richtofen ran out of the lobby door.

Dempsey rolled his eyes and muttered, "Great. I'm so inspired."

They ran out of the office and entered the parking lot. Nikolai looked over his shoulder and saw a large crowd was incoming.

"Oh crap" he muttered.

Nikolai raised the Raid and fired into the crowd. Dempsey came over and fired the Cobra. It blew apart the horde and Dempsey said, "Oh, that's what the inside of your head looks like!"

Richtofen fired the Phantom and stated, "Tis very interesting, isn't it American?"

They stopped shooting and ran out of the parking lot. They entered McDonald's and Richtofen noticed the crashed Corvette.

"Let me guess. Dis vas your idea American?" announced Richtofen.

Dempsey smiled and replied, "Damn straight."

Takeo ran over to the Deadshot Daiquiri machine and bought a bottle. He drank it down and gagged, "Ugh, it's sucking the water out of my mouth."

They threw grenades into the restaurant and ran outside. They reached the street and noticed a trail of blood leading into the maze,

"It appears Hansel and Gretel ran out of breadcrumbs" muttered Richtofen.

They entered the maze and closely followed the trail. They could hear the zombies coming behind them, but they could not see them.

They reached the recreation center and barged into the pool.

Richtofen noticed the pool of blood and exclaimed, "Wunderbar! My bath is ready!"

Dempsey rolled his eyes and muttered, "For the love of God."

They all turned and fired at the crowd approaching behind them. Takeo loaded them up with his two SMGs and stated, "I will add your bodies to my Zen garden!"

Nikolai grunted and responded, "Takeo, stop yakking about gardening and kill!"

They exited the rec. center and entered the construction site.

"Why does this place look so familiar?" joked Dempsey.

Nobody commented on that, so they kept shooting.

They crossed the ravine and Dempsey saw something completely awesome.

"Jug-juice!" yelled the Marine. He ran over to the vending machine and bought a bottle. He drank it down and said, "Jugger-girl, I think I'm falling for you."

Richtofen purchased a bottle and gulped it down. He smiled and stated, "Dis, iz ze POWER!"

They all got a bottle and Dempsey ordered, "Come on dandy tarts. No point standing here."

They sprinted back into the bar and Nikolai muttered, "Seriously, can't we stop running around?"

"Only if you vish to die Cossack" answered Richtofen.

Richtofen ran over to the Magarita machine and pressed the buy button. A small silver cocktail popped out. He grabbed the glass and drank it in one shot. He coughed and said, "Blah! It tastes like Dr. Pepper!"

He looked on his side and noticed several more mags had suddenly appeared. He smiled and stated, "Ah! Zhat's awesome!"

They ran back into the apartment building and set up a line of fire in front of the stairs.

"Come on maggot bags" ordered Dempsey.

The zombies began flooding into the building and they all fired. Nikolai threw a grenade and watched it blow apart the crowd.

"As much power a Soviet aggression!" he yelled.

They backed up and Takeo cleared the last of the zombies with the Tokyo and Rose.

"Why the hell didn't we notice this?"

Dempsey flipped the latch on the box and muttered "Unbelievable. We missed the goddamn box."

They were inside the construction site and had found the Random Box on Dempsey and Takeo's side.

The box settled on a pair of ballistic knives and Dempsey grinned. He replaced his empty AK74u and said, "Hey zombies, go any cans for me to open?

Richtofen activated the box and saw it settled on a HS-10.

He chuckled and said, "So much fun in one shot! It should be illegal!"

Takeo flipped the latch and watched the box. Then it stopped on a G11.

"Sniping, is a samurai's game" stated Takeo grabbing the rifle.

Nikolai used the box and it stopped on an explosive crossbow. Nikolai laughed maniacally and said, "Who cares about sniper rounds? I got freaking explosives here!"

**Nice new perk right? I like it a lot. Hey, maybe Treyarch is reading this now? You never know!**


	9. Chapter 9: Swarm

**Time for a little something that I got inspired from Bulletstorm. Read on!**

Dempsey

Dempsey grabbed a bottle of brown ooze and unscrewed the cap. Time for a milkshake.

He drank it down and smiled. "Sweet and savory. Just like me." He chuckled and muttered, "Well, that last part's true."

Nikolai

The Russian gulped down the clear drink and smiled. Good American moonshine.

"Pure fire, runs through my veins!" he yelled.

Richtofen

The Doctor sighed and sat down on a ventilation block. The others had agreed to camp on the roof of the McDonald's. Richtofen had found a zip line on the roof that led to the parking lot. That'd probably be useful.

"Vhere are they?" he asked to no one in particular.

He stood up and walked over to it. The object got clearer and Richtofen could make out a shiny black rectangle.

He reached it and scowled. Nothing but a goddamn teddy bear.

He snarled and grabbed the filthy toy. These stupid things were really pissing him off. He didn't tell anyone, but he could hear them speaking to him. In the voice of Samantha Maxis.

He casually pulled out thread and wound it around the toy. He slipped a grenade into the loop and pulled the pin. He threw the bear off the roof and saw it explode satisfactory.

Richtofen nodded firmly and sat back down.

Takeo

Takeo climbed the ladder and saw Richtofen sitting on a vent. Takeo reached the top and sat down next to the Doctor.

Eventually, Nikolai and Dempsey joined them and Dempsey asked, "Anything new?"

Richtofen simply shook his head.

Dempsey sighed and expertly whirled the Cobra in his hand. They had long lost track of the crawler, but no zombies were coming.

"I never thought I'd say this" declared Nikolai, "but I actually want zombies to come."

Dempsey nodded and replied, "Hell yeah. My guns are hungry for blood. They need to feed."

A loud explosion rang through the air and all four stood up.

"What the fuck?" exclaimed Dempsey.

A large meteorite flew in and crashed into the street. Several more landed in the street and parking lot and finally stopped.

"What are those things?" wondered Takeo.

One of the meteors exploded and opened up. A green glow emitted from inside and Richtofen muttered, "No way."

A lone figure stepped out of the meteor. It didn't look close to human. It was jet black and slim figured. Its arms were long and crooked. Its hands were clawed and several glowing orange lumps hung onto its skin.

"Oh great. Motherfucking aliens" muttered Dempsey.

He raised the Cobra and fired. It hit the thing in the face and sent its head snapping backwards. It looked at Dempsey and roared.

Dempsey fired again and nailed it in the forehead. It began sprinting and calling out its brothers.

Several more appeared and began sprinting to the restaurant.

"They cant be stopped!" yelled Nikolai firing the crossbow. It blew up, but didn't even faze the zombie.

"Vait!" shouted Richtofen. He ran over to the turret and activated the device.

It raised up and fired. It nailed an alien in an orange boil and it literally blew apart.

"Holy shit balls!" exclaimed Nikolai.

Dempsey smiled and said, "Shoot the boils!"

With that knowledge, they got to work. Takeo calmly sniped away three in a matter of seconds. Richtofen fired his Phantom and mowed down fire. Dempsey reloaded the Cobra and backed up.

An alien leaped up into the roof and screamed at all of them. Dempsey raised the revolver and said, "Die, you marrow-sucking shit face!"

He fired and the alien exploded off the roof. He laughed and yelled, "Learn to fly, you jerkoff!"

In its place was a Max Ammo container. They all reloaded and Dempsey grabbed it. 

Nikolai collapsed on the roof and took a swig of vodka. "Balls" he muttered in exhaustion.

Dempsey sipped his canteen of Coke and asked, "Any idea what those things were?"

Richtofen shrugged. "For once, ze Doctor is clueless. Those things look like aliens."

"Like those things from Kino Der Toten?" offered Takeo.

Richtofen shrugged. "Maybe. But those vere failed experiments by zhat dumbass Maxis."

Nikolai sipped his vodka and exclaimed, "Who gives a fuck? We are not here to think out more mysteries. I'm just trying to survive."

Dempsey nodded and laid back. "Let's just not die for the next five minutes, then we'll plan ahead the next."

Richtofen watched this with a non-emotional stare. They all still seemed oblivious of his true intentions, but it was getting harder to tell. They were beginning to learn their old ways.

Takeo stood up and said, "Wait, I believe I have found something."

He walked over to the side of the roof and picked up a large grey box. He walked back and set it down.

"A radio?" asked Richtofen.

Takeo nodded and activated the box. It sparked to life and started the tape.

"Oh, hello. This is Marshall. I am here with my friends Patrick and Brock. We're here, on the night of October 21 1963, to watch the meteor shower. Ok, it's about time. Where are they? Wait, I see one. Holy crap there's hundreds. Man, that one's really bright. Is it getting bigger. Oh my God, no way. Shit!"

A loud crash was heard and the recording stopped.

**Not a bad way to end the chapter, no? Let's keep going!**


	10. Chapter 10: I think I'm falling

**Another good chapter! An action packed, seat of your pants thriller! Just what I like to write!**

"They're on the roof!"

Dempsey backed up and shot the offending zombie. It nailed the offending zombie in the throat and dropped it to the ground.

Nikolai came over and fired the crossbow. It landed on the patch of roof next to the ladder and blew apart the crowd.

"Hey zombie, need a hand? Ha ha, you get it? Because he…fuck you."

Takeo fired the G11 and nailed a zombie square in the face. "Your eyes are too weak to behold my honor!"

Takeo looked out over the roof and saw that more were pouring in by the second. They couldn't hold this position.

"Retreat!" he yelled.

Richtofen ran over to and stated, "Get to the apartments. I saw a zip line in a spare room.

Takeo nodded and sprinted over to the zip line. He jumped up and grabbed the thick wire. He started sliding down and hoped the others would follow.

Richtofen ran over to Dempsey and said, "Zhere's too many! Ve gotta get off ze roof!"

Dempsey saw the serious look Richtofen had on his face and nodded. "Gotcha Doc."

Dempsey grabbed Nikolai and ordered, "Get to the damn zip line!"

Nikolai grunted and replied, "Oh great. Just an excellent idea. A drunk flying through the air on a zip line."

Richtofen ran over to the line and jumped on and shouted, "Wunderbar!"

Dempsey went onto the zip line and said, "Holy shit! This is way better than that crap from Shi No Numa!"

Nikolai joined him and groaned. "Ugh, my stomach is flipping."

The three landed in the parking lot and Richtofen announced, "Ok, Takeo is heading to the apartments."

"Why the hell is he going there?" asked Dempsey.

"Probably to do his girlfriend" muttered Nikolai.

Richtofen rolled his eyes and responded, "No you stupid shits. There's a zip line there. Come on, no time to waste."

Richtofen ran through the parking lot followed by Dempsey and Nikolai.

"I think I've burned at least ten pounds by now" said Nikolai stumbling in the alley.

Dempsey helped him up and said, "Come on buddy. Just a little farther."

"You said that last time" replied Nikolai.

"Ya, and I'm saying it again. Come on."

They raced into the apartment building and Richtofen stated, "It is upstairs and judging by the sounds of gunfire, Takeo is here."

They ran upstairs and sure enough, there was the samurai with his Tokyo and Rose. He turned and nodded in their direction.

Dempsey went over to him and inquired, "Hey Takman. Miss us?"

"Only if you missed me" he answered casually.

Dempsey chuckled. "Now I remember. You do have a sense of humor."

Nikolai came over and said, "What? The samurai has the sense of humor of a damn clam. Wait, what the fuck is a clam?"

Takeo smacked him and replied, "You, stupid Cossack."

Richtofen readied his HS-10 and ordered, "Ready up you idiots. Or have you forgotten ve have zombies after us?"

"Ah, go shove it up your ass" stated Dempsey pulling out the Cobra.

"Your arrogance is criminal American" said Richtofen glaring at him.

Dempsey waved that away and responded, "Whatever."

They set up a defense in that room and waited for the zombies.

"Remember, run only vhen ve have to" announced Richtofen.

The zombies poured into the hallway and Nikolai fired the crossbow. It landed dead center in the crowd and blew them to smithereens.

"C4? More like seeing double!"

Dempsey reloaded the Cobra and said, "Hurry it up."

He popped a headshot and expertly whirled the pistol in his hands. He grabbed the barrel and smashed the stock into the side of a zombie's head.

"I'll whoop you so hard your blood will cream!"

"Ja, and I vill add it to my milkshake!" added Richtofen firing his HS-10.

Dempsey glared at him. "Did I ask for your opinion Kraut?"

"Ah, go cry me a river, build a bridge, and get over it."

"Can you two children shut up?" demanded Takeo. "Your bickering is not helping my mood."

"Screw you!" yelled both Dempsey and Richtofen in their native languages.

Nikolai fired his Raid and ordered, "All of you! Shut up and shoot!"

They fired into the crowd and saw a door explode. The thing inside stepped out and roared at them.

"Oh crap" muttered Dempsey. "Retreat!"

He ran over to the zip line and jumped on. He slid down and shouted, "Airborne Marine you better be scared!"

Nikolai threw a grenade and jumped onto the wire. "I hate flying" he groaned in pain.

Takeo slashed his katana at the juggernaut and opened up its stomach. He backed up and ordered, "Go Richtofen. I will follow."

Richtofen nodded and jumped onto the zip line. He smiled and sung, "Ze flying Doctor, raining death from above!"

Takeo swung his blade and cut open the trachea. He wiped away the blood and reached the zip line. The zombie tried to grab him, but he missed. He slid down and said, "Flying samurai? Death from above!"

He landed next to the bar and walked inside. The other three were already there, waiting for him.

"Glad to see you aren't six feet under" stated Dempsey.

Takeo walked over to them and declared, "Got to the construction yard. I did not have enough power to kill it."

"Roger" replied Dempsey.

They ran to the construction site and waited.

"I hate this patience crap" muttered Nikolai.

The Juggernaut roared and entered the site. It was easily seven feet tall and looked no different then others. It was covered in blood from the katana blows, but still stood tall.

"Light 'em up!" yelled Dempsey firing the Cobra.

The zombie bellowed and ran over to them. It swung an arm and Dempsey sailed backwards. He hit the dirt but kept sliding. He reached the ravine and fell into it.

"Shit!" shouted Dempsey. He pulled out the ballistic knives and sank them into the side of the ravine. It stopped his descent and he breathed a sigh.

He pulled out one and sank it upwards. He did it the same with the other and began climbing to the top.

Nikolai fired the Raid and nailed the Juggernaut in the face. It reeled backwards, but kept coming.

"It's like trying to stop my 3rd wife!" yelled Nikolai.

Richtofen reloaded his Phantom and kept firing. It was like trying to shoot down a building.

He turned to his left and saw a square chalk outline. He smiled and went over to it. He bought the claymores and pulled one out.

He ran over to the Juggernaut and sank it into the zombie's throat. He backed up and fired at the explosive.

The mine blew up and sailed the zombie's head into the air.

Richtofen chuckled maniacally and shouted, "EAT IT! AND LIKE IT!"

He grabbed the head and drop-kicked it into the air. It bounced and landed in the ravine.

"What the hell was that?" Richtofen heard a certain American yell.

**To the next one we go! YAH!**


	11. Chapter 11: Burning Beaches

Dempsey

The American pushed the large green button and grabbed a bottle of ooze. He popped the cap and drank it down.

"It's like drinking motor oil, but with more lime" he said throwing the bottle aside.

Nikolai

The drunk gulped down the smooth beer and burped. Too plain.

"This is like flavored water" complained the Russian backing up from the Mule Kick machine.

He ran out to the construction site and flipped open the box. It landed on a FN-FAL and he smiled.

"Ah, I love falafels!" he stated.

He activated it again and got a FAMAS, "Like the PPSh! But suckier."

Richtofen came over and started the box. He watched it settle on a LAW and he laughed.

"Time to lay down the LAW!" he joked picking up the rocket launcher.

Takeo joined them and used the box. It cycled through and settled on a new weapon. The weapon looked like the Thundergun, but thinner. It had several knobs and dials on the sides and had a side handle. A large tube filled with some odd substance was placed in the middle. At the end was a pyramid point with a hole at the top.

Takeo grabbed it and wondered, "Any ideas what this is?"

"Maybe some kind of chemical thrower?" replied Richtofen.

Takeo shrugged and said, "It's heavy, whatever it is."

Dempsey sprinted over and stated, "Hey mates. Cool gun Takman." He flipped the latch and watched it settle on a HK21.

"Good. A big enough gun to kill SOPA."

A loud groan went through the air and Richtofen asked, "Anyone want to run to the elevator?" 

They ran into the pool and saw a large crowd of zombies waiting for them.

"RAAGH!" yelled Takeo raising the Sandstorm. HE pulled the trigger and let it fly.

White hot sand burst from the nozzle and landed over the zombies. It tore flesh from bone and left them a pile of worn bones in seconds.

"Holy shit that's cool!" Dempsey shouted.

Takeo smiled and reloaded by taking out the tube and inserting another. 

They ran to the lobby and got into the elevator. A long trail of zombies were following, but that was unimportant.

They reached the Pack-a-Punch machine and noticed the wall was back to normal.

"Step aside gents, man with a plan coming through!" Takeo shouted running to the machine. He inserted the Sandstorm and muttered, "This will be interesting."

It came out and looked no different, except for two things. The first was it was covered in red runes, like symbols. The second was the sand was now a reddish brown.

Takeo grabbed it and examined the side. On the handle was written: Desert Rage.

"May the sands of our beaches, be stained with their blood!"

"Wow, great poetry man" muttered Dempsey putting in the HK21. He pulled out the Oscillator and said, "Hey zombies! Wanna do some target practice?"

Richtofen placed in the LAW and muttered, "Hurry up already." He grabbed the M67 Anarchy and yelled, "The body bags will be overflowing tonight!"

Nikolai quickly placed in the FN-FAL and grunted, "So much fucking waiting. In Soviet Russia, shit gets done instantly!" He grabbed the EPC-WN and replaced it with the FAMAS.

"Nikolai! Hurry it up!" yelled shouted Dempsey.

"Trying!" responded Nikolai.

He grabbed the G16-GL35 and ran away from the machine.

Not a moment too soon. The wall exploded for the second time and a Juggernaut stepped out, again. It roared and began running to them,

"Shit, shit, shit" Nikolai repeated running as fast as he could. Dempsey grabbed his arm and pulled him forward.

They got back into the elevator and quickly closed it.

They heard it smash into the door, but no spikes.

They all sighed and Takeo said, "Same plan. We get to the construction site. Try not to get lost."

"I'm ready to kick some freak-meat ass" growled Dempsey.

They reached the bottom and Takeo fired the Desert Rage. The sand engulfed the crowd and made the air hot.

"From Hawaii with love!" yelled Dempsey.

Takeo reloaded the sandblaster and ordered, "Go right."

They went into the alley and Dempsey ran over to the Staminup machine. He purchased a bottle and gulped it down. He groaned and muttered, "It's like drinking liquid alum! Blah!"

They got into the apartment building and waited.

"My turn" said Richtofen lifting the Anarchy.

They poured into the building and Richtofen let loose. The automatic launcher fired rockets into the crowd and blew them apart.

"Ah ha ha! Let anarchy reign!" yelled Richtofen.

They ran upstairs and jumped into the street.

"I. Hate. Running" complained Nikolai.

"Get up" ordered Dempsey.

"I hate running. I hate carrying around all these guns. I'm hungry. My coat smells weird."

"You should try washing it" replied Takeo.

"That's what she said!" laughed Nikolai.

"'bout time" muttered Richtofen.

They went into the bar and Dempsey ordered, "Look alive mates. We got freak bags in every direction."

They all fired and grouped into a circle.

"Bring it motherfuckers!" shouted Dempsey.

Takeo swung the Desert Rage and blasted away the crowd. "My victory is your death!"

Dempsey reloaded Oscillator and kept firing. "I'll shred you shit freak bits!"

Nikolai switched to the G16-GL35 and yelled, "No! You try and try, but you will get no vodka!"

Richtofen reloaded the Phantom and announced, "So many corpses! Enough for everybody! No! I will not share! Mine!"

The group ran out of the bar and entered the construction site. "How many are there?" asked Nikolai.

"A shit load!" replied Dempsey. They all turned and fired. The rounds/rockets destroyed the remaining zombies with the precision of a bulldozer.

**One thing to say: THE SEQUEL IS COMING!**


	12. Chapter 12: Vote

**Time for a more dramatic chapter in the story!**

Takeo

Takeo opened a bottle of purple fluid and drank it down. Its prune-like taste stuck in his throat and he gagged.

"Ugh, I shouldn't have drank that" he muttered.

Richtofen

The Doctor opened a bottle of blue and drank a shot. Pure vile ran through his body and he gagged.

"I've drank better drinks made of fish guts!"

Dempsey

"Oh crap, oh crap!" yelled Dempsey running. A Juggernaut had ambushed him in the construction site, and he had no re-enforcements.

"Help my ass!" Dempsey shouted firing the Cobra into the beast. It swung its arm and sent him flying into a steel bar. He groaned and got back up.

"Bring it bitch!" he declared reloading the Python. It swung again and sent Dempsey to the ground.

"You better watch it! I'll bite your nuts off!" he shouted on the ground.

Suddenly, rockets sailed in and hit the beast dead on. It roared in pain, but the barrage continued.

Eventually, the zombie fell, its flesh seared from the explosions.

"Your screams of agony are music to my ears!" announced Richtofen kicking the body.

He turned and noticed Dempsey on the ground.

"Ah, American. In such a vulnerable position. How embarrassing for a soldier of your stature."

"Shut up and revive me!" replied Dempsey raising the Cobra. "Or I'll shoot off your nuts!"

"Vell, I don't vant zhose shot off" muttered Richtofen.

Nikolai

The Russian purchased a bottle of poison and gulped it down. He regretted it immediately.

"So…sour. Vodka…help!"

He washed down the taste with his personnel bottle of vodka and burped.

Dempsey came over and he looked extremely pissed. "I gotta buy all my shit back!" he muttered buying a bottle of Staminup.

Takeo

Takeo entered the bar and reached the Magarita machine. He pushed a button on a screen and out popped a margarita cocktail. He grabbed the glass and drank it down.

"Hm. This reminds me of Japan. So peaceful, yet with a bite!"

He threw it aside and walked into the construction site. Richtofen and Dempsey were yelling at each other and Takeo rolled his eyes. Stupid children.

Takeo reached an unfinished two-story building and saw it had a zip line that lead into the other side of the construction site.

"Cool" muttered Takeo.

Eventually, they all made it to the building. "So, the plan is to camp here?" asked Nikolai.

Takeo nodded.

"Good. I hate running" Nikolai commented.

"I zhink it's quite enjoyable actually" stated Richtofen.

"Yeah, well fuck you" said Nikolai. "Run your ass off, I'll stay here."

Richtofen grabbed Nikolai by the coat and elbowed him in the face. Nikolai grabbed his nose and Richtofen uppercutted his chin. Nikolai collapsed and Richtofen ordered, "Shut your damn mouth for once Cossack! No one cares if your fat ass can't keep up!"

Nikolai groaned in pain and Dempsey shoved Richtofen. "Ease up Doc" he shouted at the Doctor. "Take whatever's up your ass out before I turn you inside out."

"Hundin arsch schwachkopf American" responded Richtofen. "You are so stupid, I should kill you now!"

Dempsey raised the Cobra and fired. The round nailed Richtofen in the arm and sent him to the ground.

"Vhat vas zhat for?" asked Richtofen.

"Pissing me off" replied Dempsey. The Marine reloaded the revolver and said, "You're a Doc, fix yourself up."

Richtofen growled and pulled out a wad of bandages.

Dempsey went over to Nikolai and inquired, "You okay man?"

"Fine" said Nikolai getting up. "My nose hurts like a bitch though."

"So what should we do with you?" wondered Dempsey standing over Richtofen.

"Vhat?" Richtofen startled.

"I vote to kill you and throw you in the ravine" said Dempsey. "Anyone else?"

"Second it" stated Nikolai.

"Vait! I can explain!" Richtofen yelled panicked.

"Too late Doc. Your vote Takman."

Takeo sighed. "We shouldn't kill him."

"Oh thank you Takeo" Richtofen blubbered. "I vill never forget your kindness! Your…"

Before Richtofen could continue, Takeo slugged him in the face. Richtofen collapsed to the ground unconscious.

Dempsey laughed and said, "I thought you said we shouldn't kill him."

"I did" replied Takeo. "I didn't say we couldn't knock him out."

"Not as satisfying, but I enjoyed it" Nikolai stated rubbing his nose.

**I just love how Takeo can do a one hit knockout without bracing for it or anything. Funny as crap if you ask me.**


	13. Chapter 13: One Missed Call

Dempsey fired his Cobra and yelled, "Just like Germany, you fail again!"

Takeo unloaded the Desert Rage down the staircase, swarming the crowd. "Burning flesh!" the samurai exclaimed.

Nikolai pumped the Raid and fired again. "We Soviets are experts in kicking ass!"

The zombies started to swarm and Dempsey said, "We gotta move!"

They backed up and Takeo asked, "What about Richtofen?"

They had left him in the corner of the second story to not deal with him.

"Leave him" replied Dempsey running onto the zip line. He hooked up and sailed through the air.

Nikolai quickly followed and Takeo muttered, "Damn my conscious."

He ran to the corner and grabbed Richtofen by the coat. He lifted him and placed him on his left shoulder.

Takeo got back to the zip line and leaped on. He gripped Richtofen to prevent him from falling and jumped off.

"I told you to leave him" growled Dempsey.

"I don't care" responded Takeo.

Dempsey rolled his eyes and handed Takeo the Cobra. "Try to keep up" he said taking Takeo's Desert Rage.

They ran into the pool and Nikolai unloaded the G16-GL35. "Wait, I'm hitting shit right?"

Dempsey slammed in another tube into the sandblaster and kept firing. "Freaking bring it!" he said through the wind.

Takeo raised his right arm and fired the Cobra. It was difficult to aim with Richtofen on his shoulder, but he did hit zombies.

Nikolai backed up into the lobby and saw something out of place. Another teddy bear.

He turned and loaded the thing up with bullets. A ring went out, then music began playing.

"FUCK YEAH!" yelled Dempsey.

It started with a guitar and drum barrage of metal. It was more synchronized then then the last one and had a creepier feel.

I lurk in the shadows of your dreams

I unstitch the staple at the seams

I burn down the house of sanity

At the end all that's left is JUST ME!

I'M YOUR EYES, MAKES YOU ILL!

I'M YOUR HANDS WHEN YOU MUST KILL!

YOU KNOW IT INSIDE, I'm…

I'M THE DARK, DRIVES YOUR FEAR!

I'M THE WHISPERS IN YOUR EAR!

YOU KNOW IT INSIDE, I'm…

Dempsey whistled and muttered, "God damn. She did it again."

The four warriors ran (well, three ran, one carried) out of the rec center and entered the maze.

What death destroy and fire burn

None of this is of your concern

I do not need your help in life

All that you bring me is PURE STRIFE!

I'M YOUR MOUTH, MAKES YOU SIN!

I'M ALL THE ANGER THAT'S WITHIN!

YOU KNOW IT INSIDE, I'm…

I'M THE SCYTHE, CUTS YOU THROUGH!

I'M ALL THE HATE THAT YOU KNEW!

YOU KNOW IT INSIDE, I'm…

A lone guitar started playing, creating beats with the rhythm of a heartbeat. The noise was so great it rang louder then the gunshots.

"I would dance, but I prefer shooting" said Nikolai unloading the Raid.

Takeo reloaded the Cobra and yelled, "Music to damn the damned!"

By then they were inside the parking lot, still running and gunning. The music made them shoot faster and aim quicker. It was inspiration.

Then the singer came back, with a voice as pure as the first time they heard her.

You can't see me, you don't know me

You can't see me, you don't know me

You can't see me, you don't know me

NO!

The music roared with fury and made glass shake.

"Holy high hell!" declared Dempsey.

The guitars subsided and the singer yelled two words:

I'M YOU!

The song finished with a final guitar riff and Dempsey said, "Wow, not bad."

The four rested back at the restaurant, eating some of the grub. Dempsey and Nikolai enjoyed the food, but Takeo was repulse.

"How can you eat this garbage?" he inquired biting into a burger.

"Dempsey shrugged. "Tastes pretty good to me."

Nikolai pointed to Richtofen and asked, "What should we do with him?"

Richtofen was still unconscious, so they had laid him down on a bench.

Dempsey smiled and replied, "Watch this."

The Marine stood and grabbed his canteen. He walked over to the Doctor and poured the Coca-Cola onto his head.

Richtofen sputtered and shouted, "Ficken!"

Dempsey tossed him a burger and responded, "Shut up and eat."

Richtofen didn't even notice the burger. He stood up and ran into the kitchen.

"Must've not liked the burger" muttered Nikolai.

Richtofen came back with a large grey box. The thing looked like a radio, but with one difference. This one had a mike.

"What the hell?" exclaimed Dempsey. "How'd you know it was there?"

"Vhile I vas unconscious, I vas able to find it by replaying all ze events vith my mind" explained Richtofen. He placed it on the table and started configuring the radio.

He dialed in a station and got nothing but static. He slowly turned the knob until he started to hear something.

"Hello?" Richtofen said into the mike. Something like a reply came, but it could've been a rush of static.

"Damn" the Doctor muttered. He turned the knob again and asked a second time.

"Who is this?" was the reply.

Richtofen punched the air in victory. "Dis iz Ri… uh, Rick. I am here with my friends Tony, Nick, and Jack. Vho are you?"

The radio answered, "Private John Powers of the Unites States Army."

Dempsey sighed in relief. "Good old US military. We're going to need them."

Richtofen put down the mike and stated, "Ve should smash dis thing."

"What?" Dempsey asked startled. "Are you fucking with me Doc? Why?"

"Why?' Richtofen seemed insulted. "I am a Nazi SS soldier. Even if ze war iz over, I'd still be a target! And Takeo iz a member of the Japanese Imperial Army! Ve cannot risk it."

"Your crazy Doc" argued Dempsey. "We'll give you and Takman some civie clothes. Do you realize what this could mean?"

"Of course American" replied the Doctor. "I vant to be rescued az much az you. But how can ve trust them. I don't care vhat decade it iz!"

"I don't care!" yelled Dempsey. "I don't give a shit if you're afraid to take a risk. I don't care if your pussy ass wants to stay here and die! There is no way out this time Doc. This is our only choice besides dying!"

Richtofen sighed. "Let's flip a coin" he said pulling out a Reichsmark. He placed it on top of his hand and stated, "You call it American."

"Heads" guessed Dempsey.

Richtofen launched the coin in the air and caught it on its descent. He slapped it into his arm and scowled.

"Zhat iz ze face of my Fuhrer, and he does not look pleased vith me."

Richtofen sighed. "Make the call."


	14. Chapter 14: Breaking the Rules

**I am sorry to say this, but the final chapter of Urban Jungle is here. Now, to answer a question about the songs, they are my own creation, but I base them off others. The one in I Hate Clowns I named "I Will Rise", based from a Christian song I heard (No name that I remember). The one in this one was based from Metallica's "Sad But True" which I converted to "Know it inside". Now that I am done, let's shove off!  
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The four met on the roof of the restaurant almost fifteen minutes before. During that entire time, no zombies had bothered them. Rather odd, but no one wanted to think about it.

Richtofen and Takeo changed into nondescript civilian clothing and they all had fake names. Richtofen was Rick, Takeo was Jack, Dempsey was Tony, and Nikolai was Nick, Fairly simple.

Richtofen gripped his Phantom nervously. This entire thing was stupid. Trusting the US Army to save a Nazi. Preposterous. They didn't know his nationality, but that was irrelevant.

Private Powers told them to wait until they came to evac them, but they had no idea where they'd come from.

"I hate waiting" complained Nikolai.

"Shut up" replied Dempsey curtly. This was just exterior though. Inside he was excited. Finally, a chance to get some real rest. Dempsey never admitted it, but he was getting tired. He hadn't slept in two days. Somehow, he didn't even feel tired physically, just mentally.

"These Americans are pissing me off" stated Takeo. "I am glad Dempsey, you are nothing like them."

"Whatever" muttered Dempsey. It was true though. They had taken almost an hour to get ready, and no Army. Wherever they were, they were far away.

'Hey, check it out!" Nikolai declared pointing to the east.

Dempsey stood up and looked out. Approaching the city from the barren desert was a large truck.

"It's going to the end of the street!" said Dempsey. He pointed and ordered, "Get there now!"

They jumped off the roof and rolled on the ground. A groan or two went out, but they landed safely.

"Let's go!" no one person said it, it was more of the entire team.

Dempsey hot several shots into the air to get the truck's attention. It was huge, almost the size of a semi.

"Come here you stupid git!" yelled Dempsey.

The truck roared to them then stopped. A soldier came out with a large assault rifle aimed at them.

"Get to the back!" ordered the soldier.

He started shooting, but not at them. Dempsey turned and saw a large crowd of zombies were following them.

"Dicklickers" muttered Dempsey turning and firing his Oscillator. The others joined in, but it didn't make a dent.

"There's hundreds!" Nikolai shouted firing the EPC-WN.

A loud groan went out and Dempsey turned. A lone zombie was there, but it was right in his face.

The zombie swiped him and he gasped. It had gotten him in the stomach. He looked down and saw a long series of marks on his shirt. They were bleeding and appeared really deep.

He looked the zombie in the eye and swore it said, "No no Dempsey. Cheaters never win."

Dempsey fell to his knees and applied pressure to the wound.

"Dempsey!" exclaimed a voice. He couldn't tell who it was.

A flash of yellow appeared in front of Dempsey. He looked up and saw Nikolai with his crowbar raised.

"Die hell pig!" the drunk yelled swinging the tool. It smashed into the zombie's leg and sent it to its knees. He swung again and snapped its jaw to the side. With a final roar, he placed the sharp point into the zombie's eye and pushed it through the skull.

Nikolai dropped the tool and came over to his comrade. "You will survive my friend. You always survive."

He helped Dempsey up and shouted, "Doc!"

Richtofen stopped shooting and grabbed Dempsey's arm. "Damn" muttered the German. The wounds looked serious.

They got Dempsey into the truck and Richtofen said, "Takeo, get in here!"

Takeo threw aside his guns and sprinted into the truck. The door slammed closed and the truck began flying forward.

"Just a scratch" Dempsey stated on the bench. Richtofen ripped open the American's shirt and saw four long jagged lines. They were bleeding profusely and Richtofen quickly wiped it away. It was not a death blow, but if left untreated could get infected.

"Give me your vodka Nikolai" ordered Richtofen.

"Why?" defended the drunk.

"I need alcohol to disinfect ze vound! Give me!" he snapped.

"Fine" muttered the Russian. He handed over the bottle and wiped away a tear.

Richtofen opened the bottle and poured it onto the wound. Dempsey groaned in pain and whispered, "Going…to…pass…out." He fell unconscious and Richtofen tossed the bottle away.

"Hey!" declared one of the soldiers up front. "I need one of you to get on the machine gun up top!"

"I will go" announced Takeo. He stood up and began climbing the ladder up.

Richtofen pulled out needle and thread and began stitching. The treatment he had done to the American should heal him naturally, but it needed stitching to grow back right.

Takeo flipped open the latch and stuck out his head. He was on top of the truck, and he could see the zombies were still coming after them. They were driving pretty fast, but all the dodging and weaving in the streets were slowing them down.

Takeo's eyes stopped when he saw a large mounted machine gun. He smiled. Who said being a samurai wasn't fun?

Richtofen sowed the last line and cut the thread. It would have to do.

He sighed and sat back. Then he realized the soldiers had overheard them using their real names.

"Scheibe" muttered the Doctor.

Takeo pulled back the lever and slammed in a belt of ammo. He raised it up and took aim. Time to wreck some shit.

He fired and watched the gun roar. The bullets shredded whatever it hit and Takeo laughed.

"My honor, shall shred you to shit!"

He quickly slammed in another belt and kept firing.

"FOR THE EMPEROR!"

After a while, all the zombies were just puddles of meat on the ground. Takeo nodded firmly and got down.

Nikolai was already taking a nap, and Richtofen was simply sitting. Takeo sat next to him and said, "It is done."

Richtofen shook his head. "No." He looked the samurai dead in the eye and said, "This is just the beginning."

**Dun un un! Dun un un un un! Get ready for the sequel!**


End file.
